The opening line from my favorite artiste’s song “Milk & Honey” plays in the background as the mini-van transporting us from the serene hillside of Zug meanders along the curves of the countryside, the passing scenery a veritable beauty to behold. The fresh roadside green peppered with daisies and dandelions declare spring, the occasional goats calmly graze under a candescent sky. The weather was perfect for a day out and a rare break from the springtime drizzle. Soaring through the springtime breeze overlooking a serene farm with sheep grazing (and gazing) beside me was liberalizing. I was filled with gratitude for and awed by God’s goodness, glory, and grace embedded in the sights I presently beheld.
I thought about the prayer I had adopted in this season of my life, especially before I had left for Zurich. I had prayed:
“May Your presence go before us,
May you lead us, guide us, and direct us
Show us Your goodness, glory and grace
Provide manna on the way
Lead us by a pillar of cloud by day, and fire by night
To keep us going by day and night”
My prayer was an amalgamation of the beautiful and wistful mentions in Exodus 33:14, Exodus 13:21, Deuteronomy 1:32-33. These were descriptive of the journey where God had led the Israelites through the wilderness on the journey toward Canaan, also called the “land flowing with milk and honey” (Exodus 3:8).
I found this uncommonly relevant at a time when my life bore resemblance to a wilderness - my career goals confounded, my direction in life nebulous and my imaginations challenged. I earnestly craved to be delivered out of this protracted and harrowing wilderness, to enter the land flowing with milk and honey. I asked God to show me Heaven on earth. I had imagined it to be a life that bore abundant fruit of never-ending fulfilment and profound gratification, a possession of perfect peace and settled joy. But it seemed I could never so much as escape this present desert nor the nagging cognizance of it.
A few more months of languid yearning passed before God seemed to open a window of insight for me on a particular Wednesday night.
It became apparent that maybe Canaan was never meant to be found on this side of Heaven. Because Canaan is Heaven. Canaan was a promise, an inheritance to the Israelites; a place of respite, a finality of destination; a land of no more striving, no more war, and no more wandering. And that can only be attained in the life of eternity. The perfect land of milk and honey cannot be found on earth. Then, perhaps, the closest to Canaan on earth is somewhere in God’s presence. The journey through the wilderness and toward Canaan inexorably and invariably leads to a discovery of ethereal joy in God.
And the wilderness that I've so desperately tried to escape? I began to understand that it is a rite of passage, a necessary struggle on the road toward the land flowing with milk and honey. Without the wilderness, Canaan will never seem so sweet. I would never yearn for Heaven if life was not bitter. Milk and honey would never entice me if I had not gathered manna and tasted quails.
But oh, the manna and quails! The pillar of cloud and fire! These are God’s assurances that He will guide me to Canaan. So savor the manna, enjoy the journey and be led by His pillar of cloud by day and fire by night. Keep those eyes on Canaan. The harder the journey, the more delightful the reward. There is no rest on this side of Heaven, so I must not build a home here.
I mused over this illumination and its poignant aftertaste. It reframed my expectations and guided my desires. Thereafter, my prayer was no longer to exit the wilderness, but to delight in the Lord - and not in what He will bring or give, but in His presence alone.
Trust in the Lord, and do good;
Dwell in the land, and feed on His faithfulness.
Delight yourself also in the Lord,
And He shall give you the desires of your heart.
(Psalm 37:3-4)
If the Lord delights in us, then He will bring us into this land and give it to us, ‘a land which flows with milk and honey.’ (Numbers 14:8)
If we delight in the Lord, His presence will be our milk and honey on this side of Heaven, as we await the true Canaan in Heaven - that sweet land flowing with Milk and Honey.